girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
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Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
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The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
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