Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
