It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
