***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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