I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
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