Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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