Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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