yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
