Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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