She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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