I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize