Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
