VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
