nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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