im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize