he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
