He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
