Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
