There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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