I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
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