He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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