Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Randomize
