Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize