I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
