how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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