Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
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