I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize