And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize