Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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