I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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