hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
