you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
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Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
you never un-have a 4some
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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