She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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