If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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