I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
