Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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