Already got asked if we're dating
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
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