So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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