So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
