the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
