butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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