just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
