I just made out with a guy for $7.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
