no you cant smoke seaweed
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Randomize
