its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
