i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
