office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
