Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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