im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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