I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
It's blow job season.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.