Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

life is too short to starve

(678): View more from Georgia

life is also too short to be fat

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(647): View more from Ontario

a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.

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(210): View more from Texas

Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.

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(256): View more from Alabama

A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(571): View more from Virginia

On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like

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(406): View more from Montana

apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...

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(954): View more from Florida

The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".

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(404): View more from Georgia

Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.

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