The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize
